Don is a nice and sweet guy, and the husband of Maggie Knight. While his kindness and friendliness is his strength, it comes off as a weakness to most people. Don owns and manages several luxury horse and wagon dealerships in Lancre, Uberwald, Quirm, and Pseudopolis. He has built a wealth that enables him to take it easy and enjoy his later years with Maggie whom he continually tries to persuade away from her service to Ankh-Morpork. All though his past is sketchy, Don resolves to be (almost) clean in his old age. Instinct: to enjoy his golden years with Magaret Knight.

• Call in a favor from the Guild of Merchants.
• Hire a group of ruffians to handle problems.

Jasmyn is an amoral, up and coming star. She has s sultry voice, luxurious auburn hair with side bangs that often cover her right eye. She has a voluptuous body with a curvy and slender hourglass figure, a narrow waist, a buxom bosom and broad hips. She has fair skin and her blue-green eyes are heavy lidded and seductive with long dark lashes and accented by shimmering purple eye shadow. Her nose is fairly small, especially in relation to her full, red pouting lips. She wears expensive gowns and an gaudy amount of jewelry. Though she parties with a passion and is shamelessly sinful—she deeply loves her husband the famous comedic star Roger Hare, often calling him ‘honey bunny’ and ‘darling’. When it comes to Rogert, Jasmyn is selfless and compassionate, she has a soft spot for him because he ‘makes her laugh’. To all others she can come off as quite cold and distant. When needed Jasmyn can use her feminine wiles to dupe men into a multitude of lapses of judgement. Instinct: to progress her career while standing by her man.

• Give of a mysterious vibe, with seductive under pinnings.
• Flirtatiously distract a target.
• Recovers useful information in an unspoken way.
• Pit suitor against suitor in a fight in her honor.

Rogert is the frantic over-anxious type who often stutters (even while screaming). A comedian through and through, but not a clown or a fool. Rogert believes he is the link between clown and actor— an actor that can make you laugh. He wears a red suit with a polka dot tie. Rogert is friendly and funny, yet dull-witted and paranoid at the same time. Rogert’s passion is to make people laugh by any means necessary. Rogert is a coward for some inexplicable reason, Rogert possesses superior power and speed. If backed in a corner Rogert will unconsciously tap into this power and speed. Rogert is married to (and madly in love with) Jasmyn Hare, a young lounge singer with a voice of velvet. Rogert is known to become very loud when he drinks alcoholic beverages, as he usually has a bad reaction to consuming them. He usually jumps around uncontrollably while unleashing a high pitched scream. Afterward, his mood swings wildly. Instinct: to keep Jasmyn and to make people laugh.

• Run away faster and hide better than anyone.
• Go into a fit of physical slapstick comedy.
• Play to the crowd telling jokes.

Mick is a gruff and outspoken middle aged sedan chair carrier. He’s known Rogert for a long time having befriended him when he was a young and struggling artist. Though they’ve grown apart, they still keep some semblance of a relationship with Mick viewing Rogert as a son he never had. Mick is one of the few people that can legitimately make Rogert laugh. Mick is Funny, loyal and loud with a dash of sarcasm for good measure. Instinct: to help Rogert, his friend.

• Run expertly fast through the city.
• To suddenly utilize a hidden pathway in the city.
• Call in a favor from a friend in The Federation of Sedan Chair Carriers.

Pepe Simon is a dwarf, and the comedic partner and best friend to Rogert Hare. He doesn’t exactly look like a dwarf due to the fact that all his hair has been shaved off save for a blonde tuft on the very top of his head. When dressed for performance Pepe is dressed as a little child sized baby, that Rogert chases around stage and hilarity ensues. When not dressed for stage Pepe is grumpy, rude and foul mouthed. Pepe always has a cigar in his mouth and a high ball glass of bourbon in his hand. He is mischievous, crabby, snotty and often times childish— but he is Rogerts staunchest ally and he would follow Rogert to the end. Instinct: to make a buck on the stage with his best friend Rogert.

• Talks really loud with grand gestures.
• Curse out, insult, and generally humiliate someone.

Mr. Mace is a short, fat, bald man in a checkered suit. He owns Mace Designs in Ankh Morpork, the lead set designers, in The Isle of Gods and the leading practical joke, prank, and gag manufacturers in the city. Mr. Mace has a rabid sense of humor that he, in all likely hood, can’t turn off. He is always joking and is very jolly and friendly. He is a friend to actors, clowns, fools, comedians, and musicians. He is particularly fond of the cabarets in the city, and has a particular eye for Jasmyn Hare. He spends most of his nights utilizing the services of the Guild of Seamstresses, or perhaps a brothel. Mr. Mace enjoys his ladies and he enjoys his alcohol, packing away a bottle of whiskey a day— sometimes two. Instinct: to enjoy life and win the affection of Jasmyn Hare.

• Pull a gag or a prank on the unsuspecting.

A slightly obese producer with black hair and a gray business suit, K.R. Baloon is a good friend of Rogert, Pepe, and the other comedic actors of Ankh-Mopork. Mr Baloon is a friend of the blue collar actors and though he’s built an empire in his prodution house, Baloon & Associates, he’s never forgotten where he came from. He is one of the leading playwrights and musical producers in the city as well as the most esteemed cartoonist in the city. Though his intentions are generally innocent the perception of him is that he is slightly greedy and always slimy. He generally gives off a bad vibe and is not very likable due to his superiority complex. He is often nervous, and sometimes for no reason. He’s always sarcastic and short tempered, most of this can be attributed to him being a raging alcoholic. Instinct: to keep The Isle of Gods the way it is and to make Rogert a better actor.

• Calls in a favor from an old friend.
• Pull the thread on an expertly crafted web of lies

A judge in the city of Ankh-Morpork, Rotten is totally devoid of humor and compassion, and passes capital punishment of the most severe on citizens that disagree with him. Justice Rotten views dissent as something that should be ground underfoot. He has a very clear disdain for comedians, actors, clowns, and fools. The judge has his own patrol of enforcers known as the Doom Patrol that pick up 'law breakers' in and around The Isle of Gods and deliver them to Justice Rotten. Justice Rotten has a personal vendetta with several of the city guilds whom he views as morally bankrupt and guilty of damaging the principles that he believes the city was founded on. The guilds on his list include, but are not limited to: the Guild of Actors, the Guild of Fool's & College of Clowns, the Guild of Musicians, the Guild of Ecdysiasts, Nautchers, Cancanieres and Exponents of Exotic Dance, and the Guild of Seamstresses. Rotten wears a black ensemble which includes a long black cloak, a black cap with a judicially powdered wig, black gloves, and rimless yellow tinted glasses. He also carries a pocket watch and a black walking stick that doubles as a hidden sword. Instinct: to discredit and eradicate the Guild of Actors, and the Guild of Fool's & College of Clowns.

• Falsify evidence.
• File a subpoena for questioning by the Anti-Mimicry Inquisition.
• Extension, Beat Attack, Stop Cut
• Summon the Doom Patrol to his defense.

Skidmarks is clearly the dumbest member of the Doom Patrol. He is overweight and he wears a black and white stripped shirt and a blue beanie hat. He carries a club with a couple nails in it. He tries to follow orders, but his stupidity knows no bounds. Instinct: to do what Mr. Saint says.

• Aimlessly attack with wild swings.

Short Stack wears a nice black outfit with a black cloak, and carries a black tomahawk axe neatly concealed in his cloak. He has ongoing hostilities with the Guild of Seamstresses whom Justice Rotten gives him protection from. Short Stack is a misogynistic sleaze that will viciously abuses his power over those below him. The most villainous of the Doom Patrol, Short Stack totally unlikable. Instinct: to stay ahead of the retribution of the Guild of Seamstresses.

• Assault and batter an innocent.
• Stick with a poison needle.